Life With an 18 Month Old

Breakfast in high chair.  

Throw sippy cup to floor.

 Throw unwanted waffle bits to floor.

Mom picks up said waffle bits and sippy cup.  

Efficiently apply shoes and socks to 18 month old (18mo) feet, while still in high chair.

Pull own shoes from closet and apply.

Turn back to 18mo to find one shoe and one sock on the floor.

Ponder how he managed to get the sock off while in big tray'd high chair.  Decide he has long arms.

Apply shoe and sock.

Gather coats and hats.

Grab 18mo to coat him up.  

Much more interested in playing. 

To show his dissatisfaction, decided a backward head butt to Mom was in order.  

Somehow managed to catch my top two front teeth AND my bottom lip, which now resembles Angelina Jolie.  

Spend 3.4 minutes pulling all five fingers through each arm hole.

Apply cute stripey hat.

Let's go boys!

Out the door and into car.

18mo hat that was there 5 seconds ago has vanished.

Back into house.  

Hat found, back to car.

Drop Jack off at bus.

Mom and 18mo head to the doctor (sore ears.)

Open car door.

Both shoes and one sock on floor.

Re-apply shoes and one sock.

And hat.

Unload.

18mo flirts with woman in elevator "Hhhi." If he could wink, he certainly would have.

Enter doctor office.  

Flirt with women behind desk "Hhhi."

Escorted to room.  

"Hhhi, hhhi, hhhi" to anyone who walked by.

Stand on chair (with Mommies guidance, of course) and dance.  Good distraction for 2.2 minutes.  

Unload Mommies wallet.

Doctor enters stage right.

Hi Jamison, how is the little guy today?  

"Hhhi."

Doctor examines Jamison while he simultaneously manages to kick off both shoes.

Doctor makes a funny joke about it. 

Yeah, super funny doc.

As suspected, ears infected.

Doctor exits stage right.

Wash hands and head back to the lobby.

"Bhhy, bhhy, bhhy" to anyone within a 10 foot proximity.

Load.

Drive to Walgreens.

Open car door.

Two socks and one shoe visible.  

Climb into back to find other shoe.

Re-apply socks and shoes.

Carry into Walgreens and load into cart.

Fill prescription and ask for it back "stat" because Mom has a meeting (in a slightly passive aggressive manner.)

Make our way to Children's pain relief aisle.

Bust open box of Advil and dose up 18mo right in aisle.

Wander around while waiting.  

Uh-uh, shoe missing.

Retrace steps to find missing shoe.  

Discover it at the end of aisle 9.

Re-apply shoe.

"Cook, prescription ready."

Open prescription and dose 18mo at pharmacy counter.

Load.

Arrive daycare.

Open car door.

Shoes and socks on floor, all visible.  

This time one wet - impressive considering the drive from Walgreens to daycare is about a quarter mile.

"Seriously Jamison?"

Re-apply shoes and socks.

Head into daycare while juggling a 33 pounder, big pack of diapers, pack of pull-ups, and bag of spare clothes.  

Front desk staff greets us warmly - love them!

"Hhhi, hhhi (again, with the implied wink.")

Enter room.

Good morning Jamison, did you have a good morning?

Yeah, pretty uneventful.

Loads of kisses.

"Bhhy."

Exit daycare.

Didn't even make it to the car before deciding - I already miss him!